Blog Entry 6

Sometimes I would go out to play pick up basketball or football, and a bead of sweat will form on my forehead, or a persistent fly will buzz next to my ear or into my eyes, and suddenly the field (or court) transforms. I see clay, I feel the summer heat pounding down around me with only the meager shade provided by my hat protecting my face. I recall the often unbearable temperatures and humidity, and the constant presence of flies, gnats and wasps, and one would surely think that the memories would not be so pleasant. Somehow these things make me happy, though. Long practices every day of the week that we didn't have a game, and dealing with the pain and annoyance of repeated drills just made us feel like we were that much better, that we were getting tougher and couldn't lose. One or two sets of parents may be present to watch, there are no butterflies or pregame jitters, but rather just you trying to push through mental and physical exhaustion to get all of the necessary work in. This all comes back to me in vivid clarity every time I swat a bug away or I become aware of the Florida heat bearing down on me. Baseball was a part of my life, something that was not easy to let go of, and I can't help but drift into a bout of nostalgia whenever I see, hear, or feel baseball in the air. Yeah it was miserable sometimes, knowing that a long practice on a hot day was following school, and that while other kids were heading home and getting some food, my teammates and I stayed to get some work in and listen to a scouting report before the next game. Sometimes it can be difficult to explain why athletes enjoy sports so much, but it was just a part of who I was, a part of the group I belonged to and a way of life that certainly affected who I am today.

Every Friday, especially on the day of a big game against a local rival, football players wear their jerseys proudly and get everyone hyped for the lights to come on at 7 o clock. That's something I always found peculiar. They were loud, outgoing and made sure absolutely EVERYONE knew their was a game that day. But not us. Baseball players were quiet on game days. If it weren't for the morning announcements relaying information of sporting events, or the occasional day when we wore our game jerseys to school, nobody would even know we were playing. We drew pretty large crowds, but only because our success was not unnoticed by local sports papers and students. We may not have been the best team around, but we were highly competitive and played with the attitude that we couldn't lose. Of course we did, but we were always told to either have a short memory, or let the pain of defeat motivate you. I guess sports are different that way, or at least the athletes are. Football players at our school seemed to need the support of the students, to feed on the fans and want bigger and bigger crowds. Sure, as baseball players we wanted to be noticed and heralded, but we had an "us against the world" mentality. We felt individually, and as a team, like we were hot stuff, and we played that way. The greatest of athletes need a certain level of cockiness to combat the expected modesty, and we didn't lack any of that. We felt alone, and we liked it that way. Baseball was our passion, and we didn't need anyone else.